


To breathe, to love

by UpInOrbit



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Its all about the craving, M/M, kinda introspective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:56:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27382309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UpInOrbit/pseuds/UpInOrbit
Summary: He was a demon. He was an angel.And Seungyoun? Seungyoun fell in love between breaths
Relationships: Cho Seungyeon | Seungyoun/Han Seungwoo
Comments: 6
Kudos: 29
Collections: Challenge #7 — Mix It Up





	To breathe, to love

**Author's Note:**

> A big thanks to the mods for holding this round of Brevity! It was really fun to take part in it and to try to keep this story under wraps, challenging, but fun, so a big thank you for making it possible!  
> And also a big thank you to the person who roped me into this, which I won't name yet for the sake of anonymity ;)  
> I hope you'll enjoy this fic!

Is it possible, to fall in love in the time between one breath and another?

Seungyoun used to think it wasn’t, but that was before Seungwoo appeared. Seungwoo, with his overwhelming presence and bright smile, with his kind hands and gentle eyes. 

One look, and Seungyoun was smitten. All it took was for Seungwoo to laugh, and Seungyoun felt like he’d fallen from the skies and was plummeting towards Earth, knocked down by the loveliest angel he’d ever seen.

But then he’d looked closer, noticed the absence of a halo, and Seungyoun’s heart had broken, splintering into a million tiny pieces.

Still, ever since that day, he’s never been able to look away. Even if he wanted to, he can’t, treacherous eyes following Seungwoo whenever he’s near, tracing his profile, committing it to memory. It makes his heart flutter in his chest, makes him feel light-headed, but he doesn’t mind.

He’s taken to it, to observe Seungwoo from afar, catch a glimpse of him outside of their stolen conversations. He likes to think Seungwoo stands where he can see him, that he does so because he, too, likes to look at Seungyoun.

It is a nice fantasy, even if it’s not more than that, even if it can _never_ be any more than that. It is nice, even if it pains him, makes him think of all the things he wishes for but doesn’t have, can never have.

Even then, he feels it, the absence of fingers between his, palms slotted together, wrists touching each other. 

It makes him hurt, it makes him crave.

Seungwoo looks up from where he’s standing down below, and their eyes meet. There’s a secret smile in the corner of his lips, one Seungyoun knows it’s only for him, and he gulps, his heart racing in his chest.

He feels like he’s standing on the edge of a cliff, looking down, at the sea that sprays against his face, and the rocks that threaten to tear him to pieces, should he try and reach them. He feels like he’s standing at a crossroads, stuck as he struggles to make a choice, fear rooting him to the ground.

_Demons will hurt you_ , the familiar mantra whispers into his head, invades his brain. _Demons are bad_.

Seungyoun looks at Seungwoo, stares at him as Seungwoo throws his head back and laughs, unabashedly, free in a way Seungyoun only is when he flies, high above the clouds. He wonders how it feels to make him laugh like that, how the shaved side of Seungwoo’s head would feel under his hands. He stares at his hands and his mouth and his lips, and wonders how it’d be to run his fingertips down the sharp line of his jaw, wonders if it’d be sharp enough to cut.

He thinks it’s a pain he’d welcome, one he wouldn’t be able to regret.

His hands burn, fingers tickling with the need to _touch_ , and so he balls them into fists, makes them so that he’ll hide them from view. Maybe if they’re hidden, he won’t see. Maybe if he doesn’t see, he won’t hurt.

“You should go,” a voice says then, startling him. Seungyoun whips his head to the side, heart beating loudly in his chest. Wooseok gives him a lopsided smile, amusement shining in his dark eyes. “It’s written all over your face. Stop making both of you miserable, and just go after him. You know he won’t come here.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s your choice,” Wooseok replies, like it’s obvious, and maybe… Maybe it is. And still…

“We can’t. It’s forbidden,” Seungyoun shakes his head, even as he feels the wrongness of the statement, feels the way his soul violently rejects it.

He notices Wooseok’s eyes boring holes into the side of his face, but he doesn’t look back at him, unable to meet his gaze. Wooseok sighs, comes to stand by his side, a warm body that grounds him, keeps him from getting lost in his own head.

“Angels, demons, what even are they? At the end of the day, we’re still human. Strip us of our wings and halo, and we are still human, weak and selfish as well as wonderful and full of passion. We’re more than just one thing, deserve more than just what other’s have decided for us. We deserve a life of our own, and not just to live in a shadow of it for the sake of others. You’ve stuck to the rules for millennia, Seungyoun,” Wooseok whispers, fondness in his voice. “If there’s anyone that deserves taking a risk, it’s you. Let yourself fall. I promise it won’t be as bad as you fear.”

“But what if I’m wrong? What if I make a mistake?” Seungyoun whispers, words carried away by invisible hands.

Wooseok leans forward, hums in response.

“You have wings, don’t you?” He asks, even as the tip of his wing brushes against Seungyoun’s. “If you trip and fall, you rise back up and aim for the Sun. And if you can’t, then I’ll catch you,” his voice, calm and reassuring, floats around them, wraps itself around Seungyoun like a warm hug, and he nods.

His hands feel clammy, his skin cold, but his heart is screaming and he is weak, weak, so weak, for eyes that light up when they see him, and a smile that’s so bright it’s blinding.

Like he feels him staring, Seungwoo turns his head towards them, a look in his eyes that’s more gentle than Seungyoun expected, one that’s tender and raw and honest, a craving in his soul that matches Seungyoun’s. 

Seungwoo smiles, half hope, half resignation, a kernel of something Seungyoun doesn’t dare name woven in between them.

Is it possible, to fall in love in the time between one breath and another?

Letting his hands fall by his side, Seungyoun breathes in deeply, lets himself fall.

(At the bottom, strong arms wrap around him, make sure he doesn’t hurt himself.)

**Author's Note:**

> And that's it!  
> I feel like this fic was a bit rough around the edges, but it was my first attempt at writing anything under 1k and it was honestly the best I could do. it was also, kinda cathartic? In a way, so I thought it'd be best if I didn't touch it too much, so I really hope you've enjoyed it ^^  
> Once again, thanks to the mods for holding this, and thank you for reading!


End file.
